Don't Believe the Lies

They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator-who is forever praised. Amen.  Romans 1:25

No one likes being lied to.  Whenever we discover that someone has been lying to us it makes us mad and it can really damage that relationship.  When my children were young, doing something wrong and lying about it would earn them double punishment.  Sometimes whatever they did that they thought was wrong, wasn't really all that wrong and I wanted to give them grace, but when they tried to cover it up with a lie, well then they definitely got punished and I would tell them that it was because of the lie.  I wanted them to tell the truth at all times!

So, lying is something that is universally hated yet it is also something that we universally practice.  We have all lied at one time or another to other people, but we most often tell lies to ourselves.  Lying is so universally practiced that we have divided it into degrees and given different types of lies different names, just like Inuit have several different names for ice.  Since lying is so universally despised yet so universally practiced, I guess that makes us all hypocrites (another type of lying which is given its own name and used as a put down), doesn't it?  We know that we lie because we justify our lying.  Whenever we have to justify something, especially to ourselves, then that is an indicator that deep down, we know it is wrong.  We justify lying by calling it a "white" lie, which we think is acceptable, or we tell ourselves that the other person did something to us, or will do something to us that justifies our lying to them.

Whether we walk in truth or lies is a choice that we make.  We can make whatever excuses we want to but it doesn't change the fact that we choose to either walk in truth or walk in lies.  Psalm 119:29-30 says, "Keep me from deceitful ways; be gracious to me through your law.  I have chosen the way of truth; I have set my heart on your laws."

The lies we tell ourselves can be the worst lies of all.  They can be the lie that an abused woman tells herself when she tells herself that it is her fault that her husband beats her, or she tells herself that if she can just be good enough he won't beat her.  It can be the lie that a person tells themselves when they leave a position because they think they aren't good enough (good meaning merit rather than skills or work attitude), even when their employer tells them that they are a good worker (this kind of thing can happen more often in ministry).  It can be the lie where we tell ourselves that we have done nothing wrong, that we haven't sinned, even when it is clear from the Word of God that we have.  There is also the lie that we tell ourselves that there is no objective truth.  We say that something is true for someone else, but not for us.  This means we can't be living a lie because we are living in our own version of the truth.  People, please!  There is subjective truth and there is objective truth.  To say that there is no objective, or absolute, truth is making a statement of absolute truth, and thus showing that we are living in a lie.  We already know what subjective truth statements are - those are statements of personal preference.  I like coffee and my wife does not.  I can say, truthfully, that coffee tastes wonderful.  My wife can also say, truthfully, that coffee tastes horrible.  We can both be speaking the truth and both be right because we are talking about personal preferences.  However, if I say that God exists and my wife says that there is no God, then one of us is wrong, because we are both making absolute statements.  I can't say that the fact of God's existence is true for me but it isn't true for my wife (meaning that I'm right and she's right) because one of us is wrong.  In fact, when people make the statement that there is no absolute or objective truth, they are almost always talking about something that has a moral dimension of good and bad, and they are really performing a cover-up (there's one of those other names for lying) and they don't want to answer the question and have their behavior examined against good and bad, right and wrong.

The wrath of God is being revealed from heaven against all the godlessness and wickedness of men who suppress the truth by their wickedness, since what may be known about God is plain to them, because God has made it plain to them. ... For although they knew God, they neither glorified him as God nor gave thanks to him, but their thinking became futile and their foolish hearts were darkened. ... Therefore God gave them over in the sinful desires of their hearts to sexual impurity for the degrading of their bodies with one another.  They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served created things rather than the Creator-who is forever praised. Amen  Romans 1:18,19, 21, 24 and 25

Here is another lie that we tell ourselves - that our sinful desires are just part of who we are and that means we must satisfy those desires rather than abstaining from them.  I have met people who justify their sinful behavior, even when they secretly feel ashamed of it, by stating that they had prayed for God to take the desire away and He didn't, so that means it is a part of who they are and they must just embrace it (and so should I if I know what is good for me!).  The Word of God makes it quite clear that we all have sinful desires, but that we aren't supposed to give in to them and that Christians can indeed gain a measure of victory over those desires.  1 Peter 2:11 says, "Dear friends, I urge you, as aliens and strangers in the world, to abstain from sinful desires, which wage war against your soul."

I used to often think that people rejected me.  When I was a child, my mother didn't tell me that she loved me and a few times she stated that she didn't want me.  So I grew up with a spirit of rejection.  When people didn't react the way I wanted them to react, I often thought they were rejecting me.  I was telling myself a lie.  God used my wife to help me see the truth.  Yes, sometimes some people do reject me, but that is a lot rarer than I thought.  Sometimes some people reject what I said or did, but that doesn't mean that they rejected me.  Most of the time, people just don't react to something that I have said or did the way I think they should and no rejection of any kind is meant, they are just individuals reacting in their individual way, or not reacting at all because it didn't even register with them.

Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples.  Then you shall know the truth, and the truth will set you free." John 8:31-32

So, what lies are you telling yourself?  Examine yourself against the Word of God and what God says about you, both what you are and what you can become, and don't believe the lies.

Why Fathers?

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse.  Malachi 4:6

This line is the last sentence in the last book of the Old Testament, the promise of sending the prophet Elijah to turn the fathers to their children and the children to their fathers.  This speaks to the power of fathers, whether for good or for bad since it is fathers that should initiate the turning and the children will respond.  In Ephesians 6:4 it is fathers who are charged to train their children in the Lord and to not exasperate them.  Going back to Malachi 4:6 it says in effect that alienation between fathers and children will lead to a curse.  This curse can be seen played out in the effects upon any person or group that struggles with fatherlessness.  An African friend who ministers to children recently posted statistics that show 85% of children with behavioral problems come from fatherless homes and these children are much more likely to end up in prison, drop out of school and commit suicide.  All of this shows that fatherlessness leads to a curse.  Fatherlessness can mean fathers not being present in the home and the lives of children, or it can mean fathers being bad fathers as pointed out in Ephesians 4:6.

So what are the characteristics of a good father?  I believe that we find our right identity by being what God says we are supposed to be when called into a certain role or, if there isn't something specifically said about it, by imitating God's character as it relates to that role.  A good father is:

1. One who loves their child and affirms their identity in a positive way.  When Jesus was baptized the Father said, "This is my Son, whom I love, with him I am well pleased." Matthew 3:11.  The Father publicly identified His Son and stated his love and that He was pleased with him.  This affirmation came before Jesus began his public ministry.
2. One who casts a vision for his child.  In John 5:19 - 23 Jesus said, "... I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself, he can only do what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.  For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does.  Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these. For just as the Father raises the dead and gives them life, even so the Son gives life to whom he is pleased to give it.  Moreover, the Father judges no one, but has entrusted all judgement to the Son, that all may honor the Son just as they honor the Father. He who does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him."  In this we see Jesus relating that the Father has cast a vision and the Son is carrying it out.
3. One who is careful to discipline his child.  Boys are naturally more aggressive than girls due to the greater amount of testosterone present.  A good father directs that aggression into positive outlets and models good behavior.  He trains his sons to use that aggression to become protectors, otherwise they will likely become predators.  Proverbs 13:24 states, "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him."
4. One who provides for their child, protects the child and who trains their child.  A child must be protected from bad influences, but that doesn't necessarily mean removing the influences, sometimes it means teaching the child to recognize the danger and act accordingly.  It is just as dangerous to keep all dangers and bad influences from a child as it is to leave them completely unprotected.  It we try to keep our children too safe then they will grow up weak and unprepared to deal with dangers as adults.

These are some of the characteristics of a good father.  What God was saying in Malachi about turning the hearts of the fathers to the children and the children to the fathers also tells us that this is one of the signs of true revival, that the home and traditional family is restored and esteemed.  Society is aching for more good fathers.