Why Fathers?

He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers; or else I will come and strike the land with a curse.  Malachi 4:6

This line is the last sentence in the last book of the Old Testament, the promise of sending the prophet Elijah to turn the fathers to their children and the children to their fathers.  This speaks to the power of fathers, whether for good or for bad since it is fathers that should initiate the turning and the children will respond.  In Ephesians 6:4 it is fathers who are charged to train their children in the Lord and to not exasperate them.  Going back to Malachi 4:6 it says in effect that alienation between fathers and children will lead to a curse.  This curse can be seen played out in the effects upon any person or group that struggles with fatherlessness.  An African friend who ministers to children recently posted statistics that show 85% of children with behavioral problems come from fatherless homes and these children are much more likely to end up in prison, drop out of school and commit suicide.  All of this shows that fatherlessness leads to a curse.  Fatherlessness can mean fathers not being present in the home and the lives of children, or it can mean fathers being bad fathers as pointed out in Ephesians 4:6.

So what are the characteristics of a good father?  I believe that we find our right identity by being what God says we are supposed to be when called into a certain role or, if there isn't something specifically said about it, by imitating God's character as it relates to that role.  A good father is:

1. One who loves their child and affirms their identity in a positive way.  When Jesus was baptized the Father said, "This is my Son, whom I love, with him I am well pleased." Matthew 3:11.  The Father publicly identified His Son and stated his love and that He was pleased with him.  This affirmation came before Jesus began his public ministry.
2. One who casts a vision for his child.  In John 5:19 - 23 Jesus said, "... I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself, he can only do what he sees his Father doing, because whatever the Father does the Son also does.  For the Father loves the Son and shows him all he does.  Yes, to your amazement he will show him even greater things than these. For just as the Father raises the dead and gives them life, even so the Son gives life to whom he is pleased to give it.  Moreover, the Father judges no one, but has entrusted all judgement to the Son, that all may honor the Son just as they honor the Father. He who does not honor the Son does not honor the Father who sent him."  In this we see Jesus relating that the Father has cast a vision and the Son is carrying it out.
3. One who is careful to discipline his child.  Boys are naturally more aggressive than girls due to the greater amount of testosterone present.  A good father directs that aggression into positive outlets and models good behavior.  He trains his sons to use that aggression to become protectors, otherwise they will likely become predators.  Proverbs 13:24 states, "He who spares the rod hates his son, but he who loves him is careful to discipline him."
4. One who provides for their child, protects the child and who trains their child.  A child must be protected from bad influences, but that doesn't necessarily mean removing the influences, sometimes it means teaching the child to recognize the danger and act accordingly.  It is just as dangerous to keep all dangers and bad influences from a child as it is to leave them completely unprotected.  It we try to keep our children too safe then they will grow up weak and unprepared to deal with dangers as adults.

These are some of the characteristics of a good father.  What God was saying in Malachi about turning the hearts of the fathers to the children and the children to the fathers also tells us that this is one of the signs of true revival, that the home and traditional family is restored and esteemed.  Society is aching for more good fathers.